Why it's no big deal for me to change my last name after marriage

Shakespeare once said :
"What's in a name?That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."

There  has been an article from a wedding website doing rounds on FB and a lot of women I know have shared it with elan.Although,I'd been tempted to comment on their link but,refrained as I didn't want to indulge in an online war.Who in the world has the time and energy to go on explaining their life's "Why-s" to the world?But,today right after I saw it on another person's wall,I decided to put it on my blog--my dear neglected blog and almost forgotten blog!!!;-) A place where I can freely share my mind and it's thoughts.

So this  article in question was about "Why I'm not changing my name after marriage?"Firstly,I fail to understand this hullabaloo about adding or not adding the husband's surname after marriage...?It's not that its "customary,traditional or the works" It's purely a personal choice.I , for one, can definitely say that my changing my name, hasn't changed my "personality or identity or individuality!" I loved and still love my name Anjali,but,since I reverted to Islam ,I was to chose an Arabic name for myself.So,I sat on the net  and literally shortlisted some names with good meanings and after a lot of introspection, chose Inaaya,which means gift of Allah.



Much as I'd like to admit,I was a feminist(pretty much) or better say a tomboy in college and when the question whether we girls would change our names after marriage was raised in a girl's college like LSR,one could expect all "Heck no ways!!!why should I?"and there were very few meek "yes" in that room full of us strong headed women! But,after marrying and already having made so many life changes(mind you,none of these life changes were "personality changes!")this didn't seem like a big deal to me at all.People tend to confuse name change with personality change.So,yes,I changed my name(chose it myself,no forcing no imposing by anyone) and yes,I willingly and forthrightly added my  husband's initials and family name.One thing is certain,that it didn't make me a "coward or a sissy or low on self esteem woman!!"I did  it because "I" wanted to,my husband didn't even ask me to do it,but,there's no "why I did it to this?!" It was from my heart and I say "why not?"He never asked me to convert either,and that's something I find very deplorable when people ask my why have I become a Muslim!!??Why doesn't anyone ask this question to somebody who converts to /starts following  "Buddhism" or any other way of living!?

Now,there are kids who grow up disliking their first names and after growing up, change it to something else ,some drop their last name altogether!Totally a personal choice I say!Nobody can judge them on the basis of just a name!An individual is all about what he talks,what he does for others and what his achievements in life are,an individual is not just by his name alone.I'm reminded of the lyrics of this very lovely song by my very favourite Gulzar sahab: "Naam gumjayega,chehra ye badal jayega,meri aawaaz he pehchaan hai gar yaad rahe!!!"People would remember the things you say to them and do for them and not just what your name was!
Many a times we do things in life which later we don't have an answer to "why we did it?!"May be changing my name and surname was just another one of those for me!We make our choices and live with them and I'm living with mine!I'm  not ashamed of it,I don't  feel less self worthy nor do I care if you respect me any less for something so trivial in life. There is more to my life than my name and my surname and while I tread my journey exploring my path you can go ahead and  trash this entry if you may!;-)

Yes,I have changed my name after marriage and am happy with it!